The King and the Critic

A king liked to write stories, which he thought were very good. The people to whom he showed them were afraid to criticize them. They said that his stories were good.

One day he showed some of them to a well-known critic, who said that his stories were bad. The king got angry with him and sent him to prison.

After some time the king pardoned the critic and when he returned invited him to his palace to dinner. Again he showed him some of his stories and again asked him what he thought of them.

The critic turned to the guards who were standing behind him and said: “Take me back to prison.”

(e) must, need, could

A Good Lesson

It was Sunday. The trains were crowded. A gentleman was walking along the platform looking for a place. In one of the cars he saw a vacant seat. But a small suit-case was lying on it and a stout gentleman was sitting next to it.

“Is this seat vacant?” asked the gentleman.

“No, it is my friend’s,” answered the gentleman. “He is just coming – this is his suit-case.”

“Well,” said the gentleman, “I’ll sit here till he comes,” Five minutes later the train started, but nobody came.

“Your friend is late,” said the gentleman. “He has missed his train, but he need not lose his suit-case.” And with these words he took the suit-case and threw it out of the window.

The stout gentleman got up and tried to catch the suit-case, but it was too late. It was his suit-case and he had taken a second seat for his own comfort.

(f) can, must, will

A Mistake

Professor Brown was once on his way to Manchester. In those days travelling was difficult, and finding that he could not reach the town before night, he began to look for a suitable inn where he could spend the night. He met a man whom he asked whether he knew a good house where he could spend the night.

The man, not understanding what Mr. Brown wanted, sent him to a large house, which belonged to a rich man whose name was Smith. Mr. Brown went there and was met by Mr. Smith himself. Mr. Brown thought that the house was an inn and that Mr. Smith was the innkeeper, and asked him to prepare a room and supper for him.

At first Mr. Smith was surprised, but he soon understood Mr. Brown’s mistake. So he decided to play a joke on him. Supper was prepared for him and Mr. Brown was given everything he wanted.

In the morning Mr. Brown ordered breakfast and asked for his bill. Then Mr. Smith said with a smile that he was his guest, and Mr. Brown realized his mistake.

(g) will, to be, must, ought to

Mark Twain in France

Mark Twain, the famous American writer, was travelling in France. Once he was going by train to Dijon. That afternoon he was very tired and wanted to sleep. He therefore asked the conductor to wake him up when they came to Dijon. But first he explained that he was a very heavy sleeper. “I’ll probably protest loudly when you try to wake me up,” he said to the conductor. “But do not take any notice, just put me off the train anyway.”

Then Mark Twain went to sleep. Later, when he woke up, it was night-time and the train was in Paris already. He realized at once that the conductor had forgotten to wake him up at Dijon. He was angry. He ran up to the conductor and began to shout at him. “I have never been so angry in all my life,” Mark Twain said.

The conductor looked at him calmly. “You are not half so angry as the American whom I put off the train at Dijon,” he said.

(From “10,000 Jokes, Toasts and Short Stories”,

ed. By Lewis and Faye Coperland)