Marriage and Children

Unlike their parents, many single adult Americans today are waiting longer to get married. Some women and men are delaying marriage and family because they want to finish school or start their careers; others want to become more established in their chosen profession. Most of these people eventually will marry. One survey showed that only 15 per cent of all single adults in the United States want to stay single. Some women become more interested in getting married and starting a family as they enter their 30s.

One positive result may come from men and women marrying later. People who get married at later ages have fewer divorces. Along with the decision to wait to marry, couples are also waiting longer before they have children, sometimes in order to be more firmly established economically. Rearing a child in the United States is costly.

Some couples today are deciding not to have children at all. In 1955, only one per cent of all women expected to have no children. Today more than five per cent say they want to remain childless. The ability of a couple to choose whether they will have children means that more children who are born in the United States are very much wanted and loved.

Generation Gap

If children in the United States are wanted and loved, why do they fight with their parents? At least this is one view of families that American television shows present. The other type of family shown on American television is one in which everyone is great friends with everyone else. These families seem to have no problems in real life. In real life, most families in the United States fall somewhere in the middle. Talk about a “generation gap” has been exaggerated. The generation gap is a gap between the views of the younger generation of teenagers and the views of their parents.

Many parents in the United States want their children to be creative and question what is around them. In a democratic society, American children are taught not to obey blindly what is told to them. When children become teenagers, they question the values of their parents. This is a part of growing up that helps teenagers stabilize their own values. In one national survey, 80 per cent of the parents answering the survey said their children shared their beliefs and values. Another study showed that most teenagers rely on their parents more for guidance and advice than on their friends.

When American parents and teenagers do argue, usually it is about simple things. One survey found that the most common reason parents and teenagers argue is because of the teenager’s attitude towards another family member. Another common reason for arguments is that parents want their children to help more around the house. The third most common basis for arguments between parents and teenagers is the quality of the teenager’s schoolwork.

Arguments which involve drug or alcohol use occur in a much smaller group of families. Most parents (92 per cent) said they were happy with the way their children are growing up.