Uprootedness

How do problems arise in American families? One view is that American families do not have enough stability and that people move too much to have community roots. Of course, many American families remain for generations in the same town or even in the same house. At the same time, the United States is a mobile, adaptable country. People are willing to work hard in order to advance in their jobs. Good workers are offered new opportunities in their jobs, sometimes in a different city. Families must make the decision. Do they want to take the new job in a new town? Or do they want to give up the opportunity?

The thousands of American families who do decide to move each year may face a difficult time adjusting to a new life. They leave behind a community that they know. They leave behind schools that they trust and friends and family members whom they love. They leave behind a church or religious group. They leave behind a web of supports that helps keep a family strong.

In a new town, children and parents can become lonely. This loneliness strains a family. For example, the area of the United States where people move the most often, the Southwest, also is the area with the greatest number of divorces.

People in the United States know how hard moving can be, so they try to lessen the strain for these families. Many neighborhoods form groups to make newcomers feel at home. Teachers in schools also have meetings to welcome new students. These teachers might pair a new student with a “buddy” – another student to help the new student.

Some children and parents mature from meeting new people and living in a new place. These experiences can bring families closer together.

Americans are actually moving less often than they did 20 years ago. In 1960, about 20 per cent of the population moved. In 1987, about 18 per cent of the population moved. These people moved shorter distances, too. Almost ninety per cent of the people who moved in 1987 stayed within the same state. In families in which both parents are working, a family may decide not to move because one parent would have to give up his or her good job.

Family Violence

Not all families learn to work out their problems. Sometimes family problems can explode into violence. Twenty per cent of all murders in United States involve people who are related. Often people learn violence from their mothers or fathers. These people repeat the vicious pattern by abusing their children or beating their wives. There are also cases of wives abusing their husbands. Violence in the family is a serious problem in the United States, as it is in many countries.

People are looking for answers. One solution is to arrest people who abuse members of their family. Traditionally, police in the United States hesitate to interfere with family problems. However, the shame of an otherwise law-abiding man being arrested for hurting his wife has been shown to be effective in stopping him. Many cities and towns in the United States also offer “safe homes” in which an abused person can find shelter. Help is also available for parents who abuse their children. By working together in groups, parents can learn how to break the pattern of hurting their children.